The 2001 Golden Glitz Awards

Welcome to the most prestigious award ceremony that I have ever written (OK so it's the only one). As another year ends it is time to reward the good and further criticise the bad from 2001.

And now with baited breath we can annouce the categories for the inaugural Golden Glitz awards: -


Film Cast Crew DVD
Best Film Best Actor Best Direction Best DVD
Worst Film Worst Actor Best Effects Worst DVD
Best Actress Best Soundtrack Best DVD Label
Worst Actress Best Script Best DVD Extra


Top of PageCategory: Best Film

Winner: A Knight's Tale
2nd: The Fast and the Furious
3rd: Shrek
4th: Cats and Dogs
5th: Harry Potter and the Philosophers Stone

And just missing out is Final Fantasy, a good film with a disappointing ending. Sorry I haven't been able to see Lord of the Rings yet so it will be considered for next year.

Top of PageCategory: Worst Film

Winner: Planet of the Apes
2nd: Jurassic Park III
3rd: Highlander Endgame
4th: Charlie's Angels
5th: Tomb Raider

And narrowly missing out on this list is Unbreakable, a film that truly struts its two hours (extremely slowly) upon the stage and signifies nothing, and the CGI to far that was The Mummy Returns.

Top of PageComment:

It has definitely been a year of disappointing big box office blockbusters. Many big budget CGI fests have failed to impress in almost spectacular style. Unfortunately Hollywood now seems to have forgotten all about scripts plots and stories, and have decided that the movie going public are so dumb that they can be bought off with huge amounts of CGI.

Thankfully some of the smaller films this year have really impressed the sleeper hit that was The Fast and the Furious really demonstrates this. Effects are good but a good script is essential and A Knight's Tale must have one of the best scripts this year.

It has also been a year of sequels and TV \ video game conversions. This is an increasing trend amongst the main studios. It is understandable that they are unwilling to risk big sums of money on original projects, but look at results. It really is no accident that the biggest disappointments of the year are almost all films in this category. Sequels never tend to be a good as the original Mission Impossible 2 and The Mummy Returns are prime examples of this. TV \ video games conversions also rarely work as these formats can't easily be expanded or condensed successfully into the length of a film (take a bow Lara Croft and Charlie's Angels).

The most insidious evil perpetrated this year has been the appearance of the remake. What on earth makes the studios believe that they should try to remake classic movies? So far none have been a patch on the originals as most ably demonstrated by Planet of the Apes. Look guys if it isn't broke don't fix it.

Thank heavens then for the computer animated movie. With technology getting better and better these films provided some of the most original entertainment of the year. With the likes of Shrek and Final Fantasy being real winners.

Top of PageCategory: Best Actor

Winner: Vin Diesel



Building on his breakthrough role in Pitch Black, Vin Diesel goes from strength to strength. With The Fast and the Furious he is establishing himself as a genuine big Hollywood star. With many action heroes (Stallone, Willis, Schwarznegger) becoming too long in the tooth for these sort of roles it is refreshing to see a genuine contender to replace them. Keep an eye on Vin next as next year he could be even bigger.

Other actors worth mentioning include Paul Bettany for an outstanding performance in A Knight's Tale. Eddie Murphy for a brilliant return to form in Shrek. Also Alec Baldwin (never thought I'd be saying this) whose voice roles in Cats and Dogs and Final Fantasy were very impressive. Lastly special mention must be made for of the young Rupert Grint for a scene stealing performance in Harry Potter and the Philosophers Stone.

Top of PageCategory: Worst Actor

Winner: David Duchovny



A performance in Evolution so wooden as to convince Pinocchio that he is real boy. A real display of a man out of his depth in trying comedy for which he has no talent.

Mark Wahlberg as deserves a mention for not acting at all in Planet of the Apes. A big fall from grace for him a he would have been my pick for best actor last year. Joining the criminally bad is also Iain Glenn (Tomb Raider) the worst bad guy not currently appearing in a cheap TV soap opera, and continuing a fine form of poor performances we have Bruce Payne in both Highlander Endgame and Dungeons and Dragons.

Top of PageCategory: Best Actress

Winner: Aneglina Jolie



She is Lara Croft, despite appearing in a duff film and having to wear that ridiculous bra. This was a close category but Angelina won it for some amazing stunt work in Tomb Raider. However coming a very close second is Michelle Yeoh for an outstanding performance in Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon.

Also worth mentioning are Shannyn Sossamon and Laura Fraser for A Knight's Tale, and Emma Watson for Harry Potter and the Philosophers Stone.

Top of PageCategory: Worst Actress

Winner: Estella Warren



In Planet of the Apes Estella Warren displayed a fantastic talent for standing around in a fur bikini looking stunned. Whereas this worked for Rachel Welch , she just managed to make herself look less attractive than a monkey.

Other fine flops include Cate Blanchett unconvincingly whingey in The Gift, and Sarah Wynter who obviously so desperately wanted to be Gwyneth Paltrow in Lost Souls.

Top of PageCategory: Best Direction

Winner: Andrew Adamson and Vicky Jenson for Shrek



Andrew Adamson and Vicky Jenson create some great pieces of animated cinematography in this animated masterpiece. Its not just he high quality visuals that make a movie, and here we see some brilliant use of camera techniques applied to the animated genre. My favourite of all has to the scene when our three heroes run in slow motion towards the camera persued by a cloud of fire from the dragon. Great stuff.

Top of PageCategory: Best Effects

Winner: Final Fantasy



Pure CGI, and a big leap forward in animation techniques. The 'almost real' CGI actors may not have been perfect as has been suggested, but they certainly were an advance over what had gone before. The rest of the film looked superb, really closing the gap between live action and animation.

Top of PageCategory: Best Soundtrack

Winner: Shrek



Refreshingly free from cheese sees this animated adventure with a modern soundtrack. Excellent tracks from Smashmouth and yes the Proclaimers really add to the film. Mind you this all pales into insignificance compared to Donkey's "I'm a Believer".

Top of PageCategory: Best Script

Winner: Brian Helgeland for A Knight's Tale



Writer \ director Brian Helgeland delivers a clever mix of contemporary and period dialogue taking what should have been a run of the mill sports drama and adding comedy and excitement. Good characters and plot are mixed with some brilliantly funny dialogue. Clever use is made of real historical and literary figures to provide that period feel. Not original, but very well done.

Also worth a mention is Shrek a script that truly rewrites the fairy tale book.

Top of Page Category: Best DVD

Winner: Captain Scarlet Box Set



Every episode of Gerry Anderson's best ever series, brilliantly re-mastered and given an excellent Dolby 5.1 soundtrack (given the age of the source material this is amazing). Add to this a large number of extras including a new full-length documentary, beautiful animated menus, stylish packaging, collector's postcards and you have a superb package, S.I.G.

Top of Page Category: Worst DVD

Winner: The Wraith



Not the biggest of movies but anything (except maybe Breeders) deserves better than this. Poor picture disappointedly muffled stereo sound, lack of any serious extras, and an almost unusable menu turn this disc into a complete turkey.

Top of Page Category: Best DVD Label

Winner: Hong Kong Legends



Another top year for this label, as they provide the best of Hong Kong cinema on a series of excellent discs. Each film is beautifully re-mastered with equal care going into producing Dolby 5.1 soundtracks. Always these discs come with more extras than they have any right to include, putting major labels to shame.

Top of Page Category: Best DVD Extra

Winner: Mission Impossible 2 - Mission Improbable



Absolutely hilarious, the MTV Ben Stiller spoof featurette detailing the work of Tom Crooze, Tom Cruises idiotic stunt double. This extra is far better than the film itself.


Top of PageNotes:

Please note that the term this year mainly refers to the release dates of the DVD's therefore some films may actually have had their cinema release in previous year.

Golden Glitz is not a registered trademark of any academy living or dead.

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